I Love Creative People

OR Why I would Suck at being a Critic.

I have recently been volunteering at Bats Theatre here in wellington. Bats is an amazing theatre, I have a special fondness for black box theatres. Some of my greatest moments both in the stage and in the audience have been in black box theatres. Add in that at any given moment Bats is staffed by half of my friends makes it even more special and amazing for me. Then of course is all the amazing theatre that happens at Bats.

The benefit of volunteering is that I get to see heaps of plays now. Which is awesome, I could probably see three plays a night for the rest of my life and still wish I could see more! All the plays I’ve seen recently are wonderful independent NZ written shows on topics from Armageddon, to Robert Muldoon. I love these independent NZ plays cause you would never have seen them anywhere else. Some of them this might be the only time they get run. I just Love them.

At a recent play though that while it was very funny and entertaining I found one aspect of it deeply unsettling and semi homophobic. I have struggled to say anything about it since then. Not because I’m not capable of being outspoken. You all know I am! No my trouble is with the fact that these creative people put so much work into, so much love, how can I just dump on that? I don’t want to appear to be mean. I’m Creative, I put things out there all the time and I know how it feels to be heavily critisized.

I could never be a critic for this reason. I’ve always thought critics have an easy job sit there and point out flaws. I know now that it must be harder. I wonder if they sit there wondering if what they said is too harsh? Or just want to sit down and praise how amazing the writers are just for having written something and put it out in the world to be judged? I would be a wreck with the guilt and torn at the two wars within me. It’s easy when something is just rubbish, the hard part is when something is good, or has potential, if only this fatal flaw was pulled from it’s side.

Tonight thankfully I have no plays on just Rugby to attend. That is something I’m happy to criticize.

First CT post for Scraps of Ellay!

First CT post for Scraps of Ellay!

This is my first layout for Scraps of Ellay’s Creative Team, for which she has asked me to scrap also some of her older kit which are readily availble and you might not even know about! So first up I made a wonderful Layout using the Fayries kit(click on any images to head on over an buy this sexy kit)

SOE_Fayries_preview2

Here’s My Layout.

nodamselindistresssmall

This is both my first official layout as Scraps Of Ellay Creative Team Member and my layout for the Stuff to Scrap forum’s June template challenge. the journalling is one of my my favourite songs “Not a Pretty Girl” by Ani DiFranco. let me know if you can’t read the lyrics. This is made using Scraps Of Ellay‘s Fayrie Kit.

I also made the following layout with Sara Smile , which is on Scraps of Ellay up for sale

SOE_SS_fullpreview

My layout:

twilightsmall

I did this page in semi reverse order, I wasn’t that sure I knew what I wanted to scrap about just that I wanted to use this kit again. So I started scrappin. Playing with shapes and layers. It was after I had all the embellishments and papers down that I realized this page was perfect for this photo of twilight. The kits Is by Scraps Of Ellay, it’s her Sara Smile kit again.

I’ve made a quick page of this layout avaible for download untill the 24th you cand download it here: DOWNLOAD NOW

SO Sorry!

I have been so slack I just wasn’t feeling so hot and like blogging for a couple of weeks, and that was enough for me to fall out of practice. Seriously I have been meaning to post here for atleast a month or more, but I kept saying I’ll post tomorrow.. Well it’s “tomorrow” now! What have I been up to? Well lots and nothing all at once… A lot of web work which is slow and tedious at time and then makes me not want to look at the computer for a long time.  I have been doing some spinning, and knitting, and sewing.

Do I have pictures? No. Why? Cause my camera battery dies and i have yet been able to buy a new one yet.

I also started a new craft. Digital Scrapbooking or Digi-Scrappin which is.. well addictive. I have been doing lots of layouts and having lots of fun. I started a digital scrapbook(aka another blog) which you can view here. I am also on a Creative Team! but more about that in another post. So I’ll be posting updates about that all and about my designers new kits and such. there may even be freebies for Digi-Scrappin available here on this blog sometime soon.

I guess that’s all for today.

Hopefully I will be back soon!

A Spinning Journal

A Spinning Journal

dream

As you may have noticed I have been doing a lot of spinning lately, mostly on my Ashford Traditional wheel which is really something new for me and I’m really enjoying it. It does mean tho that I am getting flooded with all this new information, and fibres and techniques. As I was trying to remember how each item felt as I spun it, what I thought of the finished yarn, how I plyed it, and how it knit I realised I really need start keeping track of all. So I dug through my box of journals and journalling material and found the perfect journal.. only it wasn’t a journal. It was a hardback copy of Diana Diamond’s Good Sister which I picked up slightly damaged at a local library for 20 cents.  So I got down to work and dug through my Art Journal/Altered Books supplies and came up with the supllies I needed.

spin-journal-cover

I removed the dust cover and saved that for later art projectsand decided that this great three dimensional cardboard “dream” sticker that is meant for a wedding page was perfect for the cover. Using some other accents from the same pack to add some zing to cover. Next I wanted to cover the previous title along the binding, so i dug throgh all of my book binders tapes almost went with the black until I saw a tape that had been trwon in the box by accident it was silver and shiney. It was Duct Tape.

journal-button-closure

I knew that once this journal started getting big I was going to need a way to keep it closed, after a few thoughts I got out my drill. Using a 2mm drill bit (in retrospect  I should have maybe went with a 3mm) I drilled a hole through the front cover  and using a vintage shank button and a medium four holed button from and old shirt and elastic thread I attached the button.  On the oustide and on the back of the book in the same place using a 6mm drill bit made a hole atthe same height but a bit further in and attached a piece of leather thonging with a bit of glue. I made the leather long enough to wrap arounde the whole book once and a half. Closure done.

journal-cover-page

Next came the title page/ splash page of when you first open the book. Using two differnt but coordinating scarpbooking papers I  I went to covering the existing pages. I then wanted to put some kind of title page digging through some of my random free graphic I got from Smashing Magazine and fun fonts from Dafont I made this simple image in GIMP(free equivilant to photoshop).

journal-page-one

Then last thing to do was start the actual journalling so I dug out the left overs from my first handspun and start the entry for that. I had decided that there were a few things I was going to write about for at least each yarn I could write about more if need be. I also needed to cover the old writeing so I used some more of my scrap book papers also to combat with growing thickness I ripped out three pages after this one then glued those two pages together. That is that and my spinning journal.

The Things We Do.

There is this YouTube animated video that has been around for awhile now, of a little kiwi who nails these trees to the side of a mountain. After he has all the trees where he needs them, he jumps over the edge of the cliff and pretends to fly. You see the look of joy and pleasure or being able to “fly” on his face as he stretches out his wings before fading into the mist. The ending is left vaguely open but you do hear a soft thud, which I have always understood as the poor kiwi’s death.

This video has always made me cry, it is so raw and brings up so many feelings in me. It makes me feel so real and understood. I feel like that kiwi a bird given wings two small to support my own weight and take to the air. Knowing fully well that I’m not the only one out there but that never really helps the the cause at hand. I also understand no matter how many time people bawlk and ghawf that sometimes you need to do what you need to do.

In my live there have been several of those need to do things in my life. the biggest and most shocking has probably been transition. This is my jumping off the cliff with trees nailed to it event in my life. People don’t seem to understand why I would do something so drastic. Why do you make yourself an outcast and leper to society when you could have gone on living how you were before. Living… that’s something I didn’t start doing until that July morning when I said “as of today I am going to live as female” and I did. See like the little kiwi I had to take that chance that I might die, lose my friend, lose my family, getting beaten up, or hurt all for even a days worth of feeling “right”.

I can clearly imagine the exhilaration of knowing this is how those seagulls and sparrows feel.  Knowing that even for within this moment thins are as they should be. You see I didn’t transition because I chose to, because I wanted to. I Transition despite not wanting to and because I HAD to. My choices were very limited death(if not by my own hand the just of my soul and spirit) or transition. I chose life. To be honest I don’t regret my choice at all. It isn’t always the easiest life, but it is an interesting and adventurous life. It has taken me to place and introduced me to people I would have never known otherwise. Is it the life I would have chosen? No, but someone’s got to do it, and it might as well be me.  I’m happy and to me that’s what counts.

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